Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Existing...floating from one day to the next unsure of what the future holds. Never certain, predictions unclear and dreams starting to fade. What defines me? Will anyone be able to see what I'm not or forget what I once was and if so will that be what defines me? Who will I become or what will become of me? I'm trying to tame these thoughts, quiet the negativity and pity, grief and sadness numbs me. Running from reality, I'm slowed down by lack of motivation and resilience. There is no more blood pumping to give me the energy to suceed, my complacent heart will no longer beat. I'm stuck in this worldwind sinking to the bottom with no hopes of escape. No longer interested in the pursuit of wealth, love or time, only interested in living and not just existing.