Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Nice Guys Finish Last Because They Come in Last
“Nice Guys” always complain of coming in last but do they really deserve any other position? To come in first place means that at that moment you defeated the competition. Yes, I know men don’t want to think of themselves as being in competition to win a woman’s heart but actually you are. The competition may not just be other guys but can be her friends and family, her career, even her pets (thanks Nick and Marcus for the insight on that one). With other men being the biggest distraction one must always remember that at any given moment we could be doing something else rather than being in your company. With that said, you should always behave in a manner that lets us know that our time is worth spending with you. If most women are like me, I’m always thinking of what else I can be doing with my time. Ok, “nice guys” can you honestly say that you step up to the plate when it comes to dating? Do you say and do the things that she likes just because you know she likes them? Ego aside, nice guys can really move up if they just project that upfront and not wait for the women to ask you to do so. In my experience, I have noticed that most “nice guys” are afraid of rejection so they don’t say or do certain things because they don’t want to be turned down. In my opinion that goes with the saying “nothing ventured, nothing gained.” Sometimes in order to win big, you have to play big and I mean that in the simplest way possible. Not telling her how you truly feel (or saying so in a weirdo way) can cause her to be unsure and possibly move on. You don’t have to always try so hard NOT to be like other guys, trust me if you are a nice guy she will see that from the start and that is probably a major reason why she would even share her time with you. My advice to nice guys is to not be so guarded and let your emotions show a little especially if they are genuine unlike the bad boys in which we already know that. Take more risk when dating, if you are rejected, so what move on. If a woman likes you then she will tell you by her body language as well as her words, if you see the door is open then walk in and not stand there waiting for the invite if so you may be waiting alone and at the end of the race while she is at the finish line with the guy who came in first.